No man is a lost cause. Setting thine foot on a path often seems irreversible, but it is not so. All it takes is to consider turning back, or choosing a different fork of the road ahead. Sometimes there are signposts that announce that possibility, a chance to make a new decision, oft times there are no guideposts to show the way. All a man has at the end of a day is what his heart tells him, as a compass on the sea. It may lead him to where his nature leads, or where his home lies. Sometimes destiny speaks, quietly, or with the raging voice of a tempest.
Consider this moment as being at a crossroads. Thine destiny lies upon a choice now, thou canst either follow the pain and suffering that thee hath endured, allowing it to choose thine path for thee. Or, thee canst defy all that hath befallen thee and make a new choice, one that allows thee to set thine own path freely. Accept responsibility for thine own fate, all that hath happened in past doth not need define thee now.
As always, if thou wouldst like to talk more I am not hard to find.
Templar Aldric
Champion Fisherman of Amanthyre
Prophet of the Holy Light
Templar of Valos
"The sacred writings are quite specific on the subject of killing, but are a bit fuzzier on the topic of kneecaps."
OOG - David McCormick.